A Betrothal and a Wedding

Solemnity of the Annunciation

A long forgotten Catholic tradition is the rite of betrothal, a mutual promise, vocally expressed between a man and woman, pledging future marriage to one another in the Church. In a certain way, this seems to have been supplanted by modern engagement ceremonies. And yet, parties often wish to dispense with all these formalities as quickly as possible. Couples find it unbearable to undergo what they consider as lengthy marriage preparation courses or even practice sexual continence during courtship. In fact, parties can’t wait to share a bed and start living together before they have tied the knot, what more announce their plans to be married.

The event of the Annunciation speaks of both a betrothal and a wedding. It is certainly not referring to the betrothal of St Joseph to the Blessed Virgin Mary, though we are told in scriptures that they were betrothed before the Annunciation. The Hebrew concept of erusin (“betrothal”) is the first of two stages of an ancient Jewish marriage rite. Joseph and Mary are not engaged at the time of the Annunciation; they are, in fact, legally married. Although the espoused couple could not yet live together, the Mosaic Law safeguarded the marital goods of fidelity and permanence during this twelve months period: adultery was punishable by death (cf. Deut 22:23-27), and separation was possible only by means of a legal divorce. Moreover, erusin is akin to the canonical principle of a ratified marriage without consummation. Marital relations (and, hence, the good of children) were proscribed until nissuin, the second stage of the marriage, when the couple finally came to live together.

But the gospel and feast today does not focus on the betrothal of St Joseph and the Blessed Virgin Mary, but rather the betrothal and the wedding between the Holy Spirit and Mary. This may seem shocking to many of us, including Catholics, as we are conditioned to believe and even revere Mary as a perpetual virgin, and that her relationship with St Joseph was a uniquely chaste one. The pious custom of referring to the Holy Spirit as the spouse of Mary is a symbolic expression of Mary’s perpetual virginity (rather than a rejection of it) and affirms the virgin birth of Jesus. It is not meant in a literal manner but rather in terms of Mary’s singular devotion to God and unique relationship to the Trinity. It is similar to how religious sisters sometimes refer to Jesus as their spouse.

In the case of the Annunciation, the angel Gabriel acts as an intermediary, a divine matchmaker who offers God’s proposal to Mary. Just like a scene in a romantic movie, the audience waits with anticipation. Will the girl accept the offer and invitation? Will she say “Yes”? It would have turned out differently if the answer was a “No”. But thank God, this young girl did say “Yes,” and the whole story of salvation reached its climax here.

What was contained in that single “yes”? By saying "Yes", the Holy Spirit “came upon” or overshadowed Mary, reminiscent of how the glory of God came upon the portable tabernacle and later the Temple in Jerusalem. With Mary’s “Yes,” the bond between man and God was sealed as the nuptial bond of husband and wife are sealed at the moment they freely exchanged their consent with each other in marriage. God could become man, the Word became flesh and offered His life on the Cross. Because of the Incarnation, His death would be real and because His death was real, so was His resurrection. In other words, if Mary had said No, we would not have Christmas, and without Christmas, there would have been no Good Friday and without Good Friday, Easter would not have existed. One can say that our whole Christian calendar depended on what happened on this Feast.

The whole plan of salvation depended on this single moment. Mary’s “Yes” may seem insignificant but it is the most incredible and most important answer and decision ever made by a creature of God. At that very moment, heaven was wedded to earth and the rest is history. Through the fiat of the Virgin Mary, all of creation participates in this mystery and begins to be transformed.

You see Mary is not only the first Christian and most preeminent member of the Church, she is also a model of the Church, a paradigm for what God wills to accomplish, in and through the Church. Mary is the epitome of the Church, “not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing … holy and without blemish” (Eph. 5:27). As type and foremost member of the Church, Mary stands as the pledge of what Christians shall become in the next life. What Mary is, so we shall be. Because of what Mary did and what God did for Mary, the future is now open to every human: to enter into the glory of heaven.

The Best Wine for the last

Second Sunday in Ordinary Time Year C

Every drinker would appreciate the wisdom found in this Bible verse taken from the Book of Ecclesiastes (9:7), “Go, eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart, for it is now that God favours what you do.” Wine or alcohol can be a bringer of joy, albeit temporary. But when the initial momentary elation wears off, the mood can descend into tears, anger, and even violence... and don’t forget the massive hangover that is certain to follow. After the string of drinking parties stretching from Christmas to the New Year, it’s time to sober up. The celebration is literally over when “we have run out of wine”, money and leave!

The Bible treats intoxicating drinks ambivalently, considering them both a blessing from God that brings joy and merriment, and potentially dangerous beverages that can be sinfully abused. The wine in today’s gospel story bears the first sense. Thank God for that! The symbol of wine used with the theme of the wedding feast expresses the exhilarating joy of ‘the Hour,’ not just the hour of nuptial bliss for the couple, but the ‘Hour’ marking the decisive intervention of God and manifestation of His glory in Christ. This is the hour of Israel’s liberation. Her Saviour has come! But just when the celebrations were gaining momentum, it risked being turned into a disaster. The festivities encountered an untimely snag: “they ran out of wine.” The mother of Jesus announces the sobering news, “They have no wine.” For all those present, this would have sounded like a death sentence.

This incident is a very fitting illustration of the failure of all this world’s joys. As much as we hope for an inexhaustible supply of resources, as much as we pray that the party and the honeymoon will never end, we always end up with an empty casket after everything has been drained. We know what it means for the wine to run out. Sooner or later in every situation, in every lucky streak, in every relationship, in every type of human pleasure, the wine runs out. Our family members, one by one, leave the nest. Divorce or separation may come even after years of a happy married life. Our friends, with whom we've shared so many enjoyable times, slowly move away. Our motivation to work and to produce is soon replaced with fatigue and burn out. In the parish, the exodus of the young, and the gradual decline of the BECs seem to signal the death of a once vibrant community. In every human achievement, pleasure, and joy — the "wine" is bound to run out.

What do all these experiences tell us? Have we truly run out of wine? Has the party ended? Or are these scenarios merely pointing to the fact that we are often dictated by our subjective experiences, especially our emotions? It is interesting to note that our assessment of any situation is often dictated by our subjective experience. “How do I feel?” This is quite natural. The problem is that we often assume that our subjective assessment is conclusive and infallible. But our feelings say more about ourselves than objective realities. We confuse our emotional urges for the voice of conscience. In any event, emotions are always beyond our control and they never last. This kind of wine is inevitably doomed to run out.

Thousands of years ago, the people of Israel also thought that the destruction of their country meant the end of everything. They were mocked by their neighbours as the “Forsaken” and “Abandoned” People. Israel had only herself to blame for this due to her infidelity. But Isaiah in the first reading gives an entirely different ending to the story, an objective one as far as it is the vision of God. It is a message of hope. All is not lost because God will return to redeem them. They will be called by a new name; they will be called “My Delight” and “The Wedded” for God has taken delight in them again. God has renewed His covenant with them – He has wedded them again. What brought about this change? They finally realised that glory and blessings come from God alone. No human power, riches or glory will last. Eventually all these things will run out except that which is given by God.

Our most common folly is that we often realise this important point only too late, after our own resources have been depleted or exhausted. In our drunken merriment, self-absorbed in our own human achievements, we often fail to recognise that Christ is the true source of joy, an inexhaustible and irrevocable joy, unless we choose to ignore Him. He is not only the provider of the wine that will never run out. He is the Best Wine often mistakenly kept for the last.

Thus, we must guard against the deception of subjective assessment and be misled into thinking that this is the end, merely on the basis that we feel it is so. When we allow our subjective impressions to dictate our lives, it would only lead to chaos and confusion. Here, our Catholic understanding of the Sacraments is important. Sacramental theology speaks of an objective reality, which is the grace we receive in the Sacraments, that is not dependent on our subjective experience or our emotions. Christ is present, truly, really, substantially at every Mass and in the tabernacle whether you “feel” it or not. The truth that Christ is present here is a fact. Your feelings do not matter. “Facts have no feelings!”

Likewise, even when the parties to the marriage no longer feel anything for the other, this does not spell the end of the marriage. The subjective experience of the parties does not determine the end of the objective reality proposed by the sacrament. Objectively, Christ remains faithful; He continues to confer the necessary grace through the Sacrament of matrimony, and this ultimately defines the permanency of the marital bond. In another instance, even if everyone in the congregation felt listless and bored during the entire mass, or the priest was ill-prepared to celebrate the mass, the mass is still objectively the Sacrifice of the Cross. As the fate of marriages cannot be determined by changing sentiment, the victory of the Cross is not undone by our fluctuating moods.

So, what do we do when the wine runs out? What do we do when the thrill is gone? What do we do when the faith dissipates? Many look for substitutes, only to find themselves disappointed once again because the wine will also run out. ‘Running away’ is no solution too. Mary shows us the way. The strength of Mary’s faith is when she tells the servants to follow the instructions of her Son. We run to Jesus with faith that He can do even the impossible, even outmatching the miracle of transforming water into wine. Mary teaches us to come to Him in humble submission, ready to listen to what He has to tell us, even though it may go against our better judgment. So, when the wine runs out, don’t attempt to brew some more, don’t look for cheap alternatives and don't run away. It’s not over. The best wine has been saved for the last – it is Jesus.

You complete me

Twenty Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time Year B

For those who had lived through the 90s, Jerry Maguire must have been one of the most iconic romantic movies of all times. I know that most Gen Z’s would be scratching their heads, “Jerry Who?” It starred Tom Cruise, most famous for his looks than his acting skills, next to an almost unknown actress. The most famous tagline of the movie became one of the most popular “pick-up” lines used to express one’s undying love and desperate need for the other - “You complete me!” It sounds so awesomely romantic to literally be unable to live without someone because a part of you is missing. I mean, you can’t get more Romeo-and-Juliet than that, right? Like, let me drink poison if we can’t be together so I won’t ever have to live without you and I would literally rather die than live without you because You… Complete…Me.

The tagline may not have been that original as it draws inspiration from the Jewish mystical tradition, that each person possesses half a soul and it is only when they have found the other half of their soul in a person whom they will spend their entire lives with, will the two halves be reunited and made whole, thus the man and the woman “complete” each other. That’s a beautiful way of describing the complementarity of husband and wife but it is far from our Christian understanding of marriage and the person. A man does not complete a woman nor a woman a man in marriage. If this were so, then they can also choose to end this union as quickly and simply as they had sealed it. Rather, it is as our Lord reminds us, “what God has united, man must not divide.” We are, in fact, full persons, created in the image of God in need of no one but Jesus Christ. It is He who completes us!

Jerry Maguire might be right about one thing—Yes, we are incomplete people. But it’s not because we’re unmarried or that we have yet to find the other half of our soul. It’s because God has “put eternity in the heart of man” (Ecclesiastes 3:11) and that “His invisible attributes…have been clearly perceived ever since the creation of the world” (Romans 1:19-20). Without Him, we are incomplete, lacking something, missing a critical part of our soul. Notice that when God is absent in our lives, we will always try to fill that bottomless hole and make up for that inexhaustible absence with other things - things which can provide temporary relief but continue to remind us of what is perennially missing and which can only be satiated by God and God alone. And until He is the one to fill that hole, you’ll be incomplete. If there is one line which can utterly beat the Jerry Maguire line it should be this famous quote from St Augustine: “(O God) you have made us and drawn us to yourself, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.”

One of the ways our Lord completes someone is by giving him a “helpmate.” In response to Adam’s lonely plight, God created for him an “ezer” translated as “helpmate.” The English translation is inadequate and, in our day, we may use the word “helper” in the sense of a maid, a domestic helper. But that is far from the meaning of the Hebrew word used to describe the first woman in the first reading. This is not the only occasion where the Hebrew word appears. In fact, it appears 21 times in total in the Old Testament. In two cases it refers to the first woman, Eve. Three times it refers to powerful nations Israel called on for help when besieged. In the sixteen remaining cases the word refers to God as our help. He is the one who comes alongside us in our helplessness.

This last reference of the noun “ezer” provides us with the context of how to understand the other instances when the word is used. It does not suggest 'helper' as in 'servant,' but help, saviour, rescuer, protector as in 'God is our help.' In no other occurrence in the Old Testament does this refer to an inferior, but always to a superior or an equal...'help' expresses that the woman is a help/strength who rescues or saves man. The woman was not created to serve the man, but to serve WITH the man. Without the woman, the man was only half the story. She was not an afterthought or an optional adjunct to an independent, self-sufficient man. God said in Genesis 2:18 that without her, the man's condition was "not good." God's intention in creating the woman for the man was for the two to be partners in stewarding God's creation.

Therefore, all of you are to be a helpmate to each other for so much more than mere intimate friendship and companionship. The old penny Catechism reminds us that we are created solely for God and for heaven – to know God, to love Him, to serve Him and be with Him in Paradise forever. If this is life’s main purpose, and it is truly a tall order, then we seriously are in need of help. The good news is that God gives us that help, but He also provides help, for most people, through a spouse, a friend, a community member, or a priest. God has created each of us not as lone travellers but ‘indispensable companions’ in our journey to heaven. The purpose of that helpmate must be to help us achieve the main purpose of our lives NOT to accomplish our own selfish, self-centred and myopic agendas. We are to help each other worship, obey, love God and be with Him in Paradise forever. We are to help each other get to heaven. In the case of a marriage, if this doesn’t become a couple’s life project, they may actually end up dragging each other to hell.

Finding a lifelong friend or being married, doesn’t mean that you’ve exorcised loneliness into the furthest regions of the universe. The spectre of loneliness trails many good couples and plagues even the best of marriages and friendships. And loneliness may often tempt us to find false substitutes in adulterous relationships, pornography, addictions and workaholism. Where does such loneliness come from? Well, we return to the story in Genesis. In the beginning, it was a literal paradise of fulfilling relationships as God in an unhindered way walked with Adam and Eve in the garden and they enjoyed the fullest experience of intimacy with each other. But how did the demon of loneliness infect their hearts? Well, the simple answer is sin – disobedience to God’s will and purpose. Sin is refusing to allow God to “complete” us. Notice how Adam and Eve hid from God out of fear of getting caught, and Adam blamed Eve for his disobedience, which clearly drove a wedge into their flawless intimacy. And the deep fellowship on every satisfying level is now replaced by alienation, blame, distrust, and shame.

The lesson here is huge. Living a God-less life ultimately leads us to a love-less life. Living for what’s “best for me,” while ignoring the needs, wishes, and interests of others always brings alienation and aloneness. Thank God that He has made a way for us to restore relationships and to recapture a portion of the intimacy of Eden. When we follow the way of Jesus and live to love and serve others, aloneness gives way to intimacy and our self-serving acts of alienation dissolve into a profound bonding that reflects the complete and perfect harmony of the Three Persons of the Most Holy Trinity. Between Father, Son, and Holy Spirit there exists no conflict of will, no battle for dominance, no petty struggle to be identified or appreciated independently of the other. There exists only the perfect communion of love, and a blessed oneness of purpose and intent and action. Without Him, we will continue to be restless and listless, for only God can complete us, you and me.

A Sweet Yoke of Harmony

Solemnity of the Holy Family

One of the most iconic Catholic traditions of Christmas is the Christmas crèche, or the nativity scene. This year marks the 800th anniversary of the first crèche which was erected in the year 1223 by none other than St Francis of Assisi. St Francis’ pioneering crèche featured real animals and a real family, not resin or plastic figurines. The crèche was St Francis’ attempt at bringing Bethlehem to our doorsteps as it was no longer safe for pilgrims to make a journey to the Holy Land to visit the holy shrines. You may agree that this year seems to feel like déjà vu, especially for those who had planned to make a pilgrimage to the Holy Land this year or the next, only to find their plans cancelled or changed due to the outbreak of war in Israel. So, rest assured. Even if you cannot experience the Holy Land physically, you have a chance to experience it liturgically during the season of Christmas… or in your homes.

The Christmas crèche is not like any other Christmas decoration. In fact, it’s not meant to be a decoration. It is a prayer corner. Here, we are invited to prayerfully contemplate the various figurines contained within the scene, the members of the Holy Family at its very heart and centre. And so, we see the humble figures of Mary and Joseph kneeling before the manger gazing lovingly upon their newborn son, the Son of Mary, the Son of God. One could say that this must be one of the most ancient family portraits. The whole scene reaffirms two wonderful truths. The first reminds us of God’s immense trust for this couple, that He would deign it fitting to entrust His only Son to two human beings, a woman and a man, wife and husband. The second is that if a family was the cause of humanity’s downfall, another family would be at the heart of humanity’s redemption.

Joseph and Mary’s family life were far from ordinary or even ideal, by modern standards. The beginnings of their married and family life were already marked by disastrous omens – a suggestion of conception out of wedlock, the threat of divorce, dislocation and homelessness, economic poverty and to top it all - a hostile environment that posed the greatest threat to both the safety and welfare of the couple and their newborn child. In today’s world, all these would be interpreted as unfavourable factors that would warrant either delaying the marriage, postponing the start of a family, calling it quits or even justify the abortion of the foetus within the womb. In fact, it would take much less these days to justify any of the above actions. But something amazing took place. Instead of turning their backs on each other and on the child, Mary’s fiat and Joseph’s acceptance of the Incarnation – indeed the man and woman’s loving obedience to God’s will, triumphed at the end. Their love for God, which outweighed self-interests and societal pressures, served as the wellspring for their own steadfast love and provided a rich sanctuary for the Christ Child.

Mary and Joseph were both significant and necessary influences in the life of Jesus – a child needs both his father and his mother. Mary and Joseph remained side-by-side, nurturing and protecting the Son of God as He “grew in wisdom.” Yet Scripture hints that they are asked to play distinctive roles. Mary watches and listens to all the wondrous events that accompany the birth of her Son. After the visit of the shepherds and Magi, we see the natural contemplative in the person of Mary who “treasured all these words and pondered them in her heart.” Joseph, for his part, receives messages from angels, who direct him to take action to protect his family. His readiness and courage to respond immediately without hesitation proved his manliness and reaffirmed his paternal qualities. Joseph was never the absent father. His humility shines forth through his willingness to be obedient to God’s will. In Joseph, we understand that truly “being a Man”, is not doing it “my way,” but always obedient to ‘God’s ways.’

Thus, these figures assembled in the Nativity scene, call us back not only to the mystery of the Incarnation, to the joyous event of Christmas, but to the very origins of creation itself. We come to recognise that the crown of God’s creation after He set in place all fixtures and wonders of the universe is not just man alone, but a man, both male and female, made in the image of God, and entrusted with the first commandment to come together in marriage and to form a family. What does it mean, though, that man as male and female has been created in the image and likeness of God? This simple verse in the Bible affirms that both male and female, while fully equal as the image of God, are nonetheless distinct in the manner of their possession of the image of God. This is what we call the complementarity of man and woman. Therefore, family itself becomes a sign that points to the very wellspring of love, the Holy Trinity – One God in Three Persons. The family is an icon of the Most Holy Trinity.

The necessity of celebrating such a feast where the family is the focus is more apparent today when we consider how counter cultural marriage and family life have become. Contemporary culture is challenging the most vital aspects of the existence of the human being, in ways that go so far as to overturn our understanding of human nature, and particularly of human sexual identity and relations between the sexes. Contemporary culture is proposing and imposing models for sexual identity and relations between the sexes that would ultimately mean redefining marriage and the family, to the extent of destroying both. Contemporary culture cannot accept that man is made in the image and likeness of God. Contemporary culture has no place for God and His kind. Man must be his own god, or nothing else matters. For this reason, contemporary society has no place for the traditional family because the family and the mutual obligations of its members remind our society of God and His demands of us.

Today, with the Holy Family as our model, we must reaffirm once again that the complementarity of man and woman is at the root of marriage, not prideful autonomy, not self-serving motives seeking to satisfy one’s personal happiness. Thus, when we arbitrarily decide to take either the man, husband and father, or woman, wife, and mother out of the equation of marriage and family, it would have destructive consequences. For the Incarnation to take place, for the Word to take flesh, the Son of God must have a human father and human mother. In the human family of Joseph and Mary, we see again how God brings the Divine into the human realm.

The Blessed Virgin Mary and St Joseph, the woman and man who wait before the manger in our homes and in our churches, affirm the beauty of this daily path of married love — this school of virtue — and they testify against “the culture of the temporary,” which Pope Francis said, has wreaked the most havoc in poor communities. Therefore, the feast we celebrate today is so important to reaffirm once again the beautiful original plan of God at creation, a plan that is not subject to the fleeting changes of fad and fashion, precisely because God had “forged the covenant of marriage as a sweet yoke of harmony and an unbreakable bond of peace” (Preface for Marriage). In the nuptial blessings contained in the Wedding liturgy, we are comforted by the promise that the blessings endowed by God on marriage and family life is “not forfeited by original sin nor washed away by the flood.” May the Nativity figures of the Blessed Virgin Mary, St Joseph and the Christ Child in our little prayer corner inspire us to foster and embrace the distinctive gifts we share in our marriages and families and spur us to help others, especially families in crisis, see their own salvation in the steadfast love of the Holy Family.

Wisdom and Good Deeds

Thirty Second Sunday in Ordinary Time Year A

We have another parable from St Matthew’s gospel. This time it is that of the ten bridesmaids who fall into two categories. A distinction is made between the sensible and the foolish ones. What differentiates one group from the other? The sensible ones treasure wisdom while the foolish ones show disdain for it. What is this wisdom which some yearn and seek while others ignore and reject?

Wisdom or Chokhmah, according to Hebrew understanding, is not just intelligence or theoretical or philosophical concepts regarding the nature of things. Wisdom is a direct attribute of our Divine and Eternal Lord. When applied to man it is the ability to judge correctly and to follow the best course of action, based on knowledge and understanding. As opposed to the Greek idea of wisdom, Chokhmah is practical. Wisdom leads to right action. It grants a person the ability to see something from God’s viewpoint. That is why a rejection of wisdom is not just a matter of rejecting reason and logic but rather, the rejection of God.

In the wisdom literature of the Old Testament, such as the example taken from the Book of Wisdom in the first reading, God’s infinite wisdom is personified as a woman. The association of divine wisdom with the feminine is not accidental. The relationship between a wife and her husband is the reflected spiritual relationship between Israel and God. The Law and the Prophets provided the wisdom writers with many feminine images (including homemaker, counselor and wise woman, and lover) that influenced their use of female imagery for divine wisdom. The maternal aspect of wisdom comes to the fore. Just as a mother would be the first teacher for her children, guiding them and tutoring them, wisdom literature was written to teach young male students how to function in society and find meaning and order in the world.

In the first reading, we are assured that people have access to common wisdom, which is described as being right out there on the street—out in public. It is in the forest; it is in the city; it is on the job—it is everywhere! We are surrounded by it! While wisdom belongs to God, it can be pursued and in fact pursues individuals. This is why St Paul can make the accusation that the Gentiles who do not have the law are a law unto themselves when they do what the law says is right (Romans 2:14). Their own conscience bears them witness that they understand what is right and what is wrong (verse 15)!

As we turn to the Gospel, we see how our Lord uses this principle of wisdom in a novel way. Wisdom is now the prerequisite for salvation, being admitted to the eschatological wedding banquet, whereas those who had ignored her counsel would be denied entry.

The storyline is simple enough. The parable takes place within the festive and joyful context of a wedding, yet the final message is a sober exhortation to be properly prepared. It relates that ten young maidens, bridesmaids, were outfitted with torches/lamps and oil, were awaiting the arrival of a bridegroom. Notice the feminine and the lover-bride motif in this parable, both being traditional symbols of wisdom. Five of the maidens, the wise ones, had extra oil with them, the others, foolish ones, did not. When the time of the bridegroom’s arrival finally draws near, the foolish ones needed more oil and asked the wise for oil; the wise refused and sent the foolish ones to buy their own. Meanwhile, the wise ones went in with the bridegroom to the wedding feast and the door was locked. The foolish ones returned and were turned away. Thus, the parable ends with our Lord’s admonishment to stay awake, to be prepared.

This story begs the question, “Why would the five maidens not share their oil?” This appears selfish, so why are they called “wise.” First, while it is not clear whether they were carrying lamps or torches (the Greek word can mean either), they would need oil, either to fill the lamps or to apply to the rags used for torches. On the human level, these five maidens had foresight; they had not only made immediate plans but had also planned for any eventuality, including a long wait, and they knew they might not have enough oil to last the night. But this logical explanation is inadequate for us to discern their behaviour. If the bridegroom is Christ, however, and the wedding feast is the end-time banquet, we have a clue to unravel the conduct of these maidens.

In the Sermon on the Mount, the Lord tells His audience that they are “the light of the world.” He encourages them: “Let your light so shine before others that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in Heaven” (5:14-16). Light is not just a metaphor for evangelisation, but we see in these words of the Lord a clear connexion between light and good works.

At the end of the Sermon, our Lord says: “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven” (7:21) – this saying reinforces the truth that deeds are necessary to enter the kingdom. At the end of today’s parable, the foolish bridesmaids make this request: “Lord, Lord … open the door for us.” The repeated petition, “Lord, Lord” allows us to connect this to the necessity of good deeds in verse 7:21 in the Sermon on the Mount. Finally, a later Rabbinic text, Midrash Rabbah, uses “mixed with oil” to refer to the study of the Law combined with good deeds.

And so, the oil for the lamps/torches was meant to signify good deeds. Then it is clear why the five sensible bridesmaids could not share their oil with the foolish ones; these latter would need their own good deeds. No one can borrow the good works of others to make up for the good works they’ve failed to do. Its merits are non-transferable. Each person must, as St Paul wrote, “work out [their] own salvation with fear and trembling” (Phil 2:12). Wise are those who understand this. Foolish are those who don’t.

Chapter 9 of the Book of Proverbs, a reading read during the Feast of Corpus Christi, describes how Lady Wisdom has built her house, set her table and invites her guests to a special banquet. The Eucharist is meant to empower all of us who dine in wisdom to go into the world with the Life of Christ we have received. To faithfully partake of the supper of the lamb in His flesh and blood is to be sufficiently prepared and to have opened the door to wisdom in the Holy Spirit. Let us all pray to receive Christ today and as we return to our seats in our time of thanksgiving after communion, let us ask Him for the gift of wisdom to know how to do His will in our particular life’s calling. With the fuel of Holy Communion, let us keep the flame alive in our hearts as we await our Lord’s coming, not idle but committed to a life of good works, so that we may shine the Light of His Gospel on the world.

Our Dowry is Eternal Life

Second Sunday in Ordinary Time Year C

Although Year C should take us through the Gospel of St Luke, our lectionary this Sunday provides us with this passage from the Fourth Gospel - the Wedding at Cana. The liturgy still wishes to unravel the mystery of Christ’s manifestation in the world during Epiphany.

If you imagine that Epiphany is like a triptych, a three-panelled screen, today we are invited to look at the final panel of the three events that comprise the Feast of the Epiphany: the coming of the Magi, the baptism of Jesus in the Jordan, and the marriage feast of Cana. In speaking of these three events, St Peter Chrysologus explains the rationale of divine pedagogy: “the great events we celebrate today disclose and reveal in different ways the fact that God himself took a human body. Mortal man, enshrouded always in darkness, must not be left in ignorance, and so be deprived of what he can understand and retain only by grace. In choosing to be born for us, God chose to be known by us.”

The marriage feast of Cana is the piece that brings all the rest of the Christmas celebrations to its final completion. The Divine Light that drenched us on Christmas night, and which we have been gradually adjusting to, now reveals the whole panorama of the divine plan of salvation. The first miracle is not just a magical performance in which our Lord changes water into wine. His actions point to something so much more profound - it points to our transformation. The human condition, with its brokenness and sinfulness, is wiped out in the divine transformation of human nature.

To understand the significance of this event, let us look at the first two panels to see how these two other events manifest to us the significance of the Incarnation. First, the Feast of the Epiphany focused on the coming of the Magi, the symbol of seekers of all time, finding the truth they sought in a most unlikely place. The Magi represent the call of the whole human race to faith, in the infinite mercy of God expressed in the Word made flesh in its most fragile form.

Secondly, the baptism of the Lord in the Jordan is the symbol of purification. He Himself did not need the purification but by uniting Himself with human nature and submitting to John's baptism of repentance, our Lord revealed that God is in total solidarity with the human condition just as it is. In other words, Christ is with us in our tragedies, in our sorrows, in our joys, and in our sinfulness to heal all our wounds through the process of the spiritual journey: through the sacraments and the divine therapy of prayerful contemplation.

Lastly, we come to this passage and St John takes the trouble to tell us that this wedding took place on “the third day.” The weddings in Palestine took three days. No wonder the wine ran out. Can you imagine preparing an unending supply of wine for this sustained period of celebration? But there is something about the number three which should trigger our sacramental imagination, especially if you have a keen eye for Christian symbolism. In fact, in a sermon of Faustus of Riez, the symbolism is explained beautifully: 

“What wedding can this be but the joyful marriage of man’s salvation, a marriage celebrated by confessing the Trinity or by faith in the resurrection. That is why the marriage took place “on the third day,” a reference to the sacred mysteries which this number symbolises.”

Faustus continues to read into the allegorical symbolism of the wedding: 

“Like a bridegroom coming from his marriage chamber our God descended to earth in His incarnation, in order to be united to His Church which was to be formed of the pagan nations. To her He gave a pledge and a dowry: a pledge when God was united to man; a dowry when He was sacrificed for man’s salvation. The pledge is our present redemption; the dowry, eternal life.” 

Faustus continues: “To those who see only with the outward eye, all these events at Cana are strange and wonderful; to those who understand, they are also signs. For, if we look closely, the very water tells us of our rebirth in baptism. One thing is turned into another from within, and in a hidden way a lesser creature is changed into a greater. All this points to the hidden reality of our second birth. There water was suddenly changed; later it will cause a change in man.”

Human nature is to be transformed into what wine symbolises - namely, the Spirit. Notice that the miracle does not annihilate but transforms the water. The wine is not something entirely new; it is a transformation of what was there before. Similarly, our human nature, our personal history, and our self-identity are not annihilated but transformed. Man is not dehumanised by this change but rather his humanity is elevated. St Ireanaeus, who is commonly misquoted, reminds us of this truth that “the glory of God gives life; those who see God receive life.”

The Blessed Virgin Mary alone notices that the wine has run out and so she intervenes by bringing this matter to her Son and subsequently tells the steward to follow His instructions. Mary’s faith is an embodiment of the new wine that does not run dry despite encountering an obstacle. Upon following her advice and the instruction of the Lord, the steward exclaims after tasting the water now changed into wine: “People generally serve the best wine first, and keep the cheaper sort till the guests have had plenty to drink; but you have kept the best wine till now.” The new wine which our Lord provides will never run out. It is a new creation. The old creation, with its burden of sin is erased, and the new creation, the action of the Spirit, is now available. In partaking of this new wine, we have become a new creation. Having become one with us in our fallen human nature, our Lord transforms our fallen nature into His divinity.

This is what the liturgy proclaims in this feast. We come to this wedding as guests but penetrated by grace, we leave as brides. We come as paupers but we leave incredibly enriched. What the wedding feast at Cana prefigured, every Eucharist now makes into reality. As St Peter Chrysologus tells us: “Today Christ works the first of his signs from heaven by turning water into wine. But water has still to be changed into the sacrament of his blood, so that Christ may offer spiritual drink from the chalice of his body, to fulfill the psalmist’s prophecy: How excellent is my chalice, warming my spirit.” In a short while, we will receive our Lord in Holy Communion. Having savoured all the best vintages of life, we can boldly declare that the Eucharist is the “best wine” kept till now. Though other joys may run out one day, the Lord’s grace will always overflow with ever renewing abundance!

Love is sacrificial

Twenty Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time Year B

Today’s gospel proclaims three eternal truths which do not sit well with modern sensibilities. In fact, they may even seem archaic, regressive and inhumane. But the fact that it is our Lord Jesus Christ Himself who speaks it, assures us of their revelatory and eternally relevant character. So rather than suppress or sanitise these truths for fear that they may offend someone or another, it is good to remember this saying which has been commonly but falsely, attributed to St Augustine: “truth is like a lion. You don’t have to defend it. Let it loose. It will defend itself.”

These three simple truths are as follows:

God made humanity male and female.

God intended marriage to be a permanent commitment for life.

God is the author of life and He is unapologetically pro-life.

Having explained that Moses’ permission for couples to divorce was a mere concession due to the unteachability of the people, our Lord then declares that “from the beginning of creation God made them male and female.” This statement should be so obvious, that it shouldn’t require restating or explaining, and yet, in today’s modern gender-bending society, making such a statement could get you “cancelled” for being intolerant and disrespectful to an entire spectrum of make-believe sexual identities.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church boldly teaches: “Everyone, man and woman, should acknowledge and accept his sexual identity. Physical, moral, and spiritual difference and complementarity are oriented toward the goods of marriage and the flourishing of family life. The harmony of the couple and of society depends in part on the way in which the complementarity, needs, and mutual support between the sexes are lived out.” (No. 2333) God is the only One who has the power and authority to define us, and He did so at creation by making us into His “image and likeness”, and it would be arrogance to think that we can redefine ourselves by changing our pronouns or performing mutilating surgery on ourselves so that we can make ourselves into our own skewed image and likeness.

The second truth which our Lord pronounces speaks of the permanence and indissolubility of marriage: “what God has united, man must not divide.” Many modern people believe that such a demand is both harsh and inhumane. Why force two persons, who no longer have feelings for each other, to remain bonded for life? Isn’t this cruel? Would this be condemning them to a life-sentence of misery? The permanence of marriage would seem cruel if we merely view marriage through the lenses of a human contract. With the recognition of human frailty and the unpredictability of future events, all contracts contain exit clauses allowing the parties to part ways. But not marriage!

The bond of marriage is a divinely instituted reality (“what God has united”), not a matter of human convention, and when that bond is created in the life of two Christians, it simply cannot be broken. This bond, is intended by God to symbolise the love of Christ for His Church. Pope Emeritus Benedict wrote: “Marriage is not simply about the relationship of two people to God, it is also a reality of the Church, a sacrament, and it is not for the individuals concerned to decide on its validity, but rather for the Church, into which the individuals are incorporated by faith and baptism.” If we understand anything about the relationship between Christ and His Church, we would understand that it cannot be broken by any power in the universe…A spouse can no more become an ex-spouse than a father can become an ex-father.

The third truth naturally flows from the first two truths: if marriage is a union between a man and a woman and their bond is marked by indissoluble permanence, having children and starting a family would not just be a theological but a logical conclusion. And so, our Lord declares, “Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs.” When God gave man and woman the ability to have sexual intercourse, He tied it with the ability to procreate. This is the reason why same-sex “marriages” cannot be real marriages and why the Church teaches against the use of contraception. Contraception not only breaks the ties between the sexual act and procreation, but also impedes our share in God’s creative love.  Cut off from God, man can never experience true lasting joy.

Love, real love, is sacrificial. If love entails sacrifice, then children would always be regarded as a blessing, the fruit of that love. But this is not what the world tells us. Our culture often teaches us that children are more of a burden than a gift—that families impede our freedom and diminish our finances.  We live in a world where large families are the objects of spectacle and derision, instead of the ordinary consequence of a loving marriage entrusted to God’s providence. Although it may seem, to selfish immature parents, that children bring to an end the romantic phase of their marriage and their personal autonomy, children are actually the gift needed to allow the couple’s love to grow and flourish, to embrace others beyond the two.

Today, the world has no qualms celebrating marriages, civil unions and what they claim to be same-sex marriages. Couples, families spend a life-time’s savings, even prepared to take up loans to fund extravagant celebrations. But the openness to children is rarely celebrated, rarely understood, and rarely supported.  To many, the Church’s teachings on life seem oppressive or old-fashioned.  Many believe that the Church asks too great a sacrifice. But sacrifice is at the heart of love. Love which is not willing to make sacrifices is counterfeit.

Many Catholics today complain and demand that the Catholic Church should change in order that they may feel “more welcomed,” and it is unfortunate, that many well-intentioned pastors also believe that the only way they can be compassionate and pastoral is by affirming their delusions. But Pope Francis warned of those he called “alternativists,” those who, in the Pope’s words, say to themselves, “I’ll enter the Church, but with this idea, with this ideology.” They propose conditions “and their membership in the Church is thereby partial.” They too “have one foot outside the Church; they’re renting the Church” but don’t really experience it… They seek an alternative, because they don’t share the common experience of the Church.”

So, what is needed is not for the Church to change her teachings. She cannot change them. She has no authority to do so because it is our Lord’s teachings. Rather, it is we, who need to change, to die to ourselves, our selfish, self-centred and self-absorbed ways, so that we may conform ourselves more and more to Christ, who shows us the true meaning of love by dying on the cross for us. We are called to continue to proclaim the truth, beauty and goodness of the complementarity of sexes, fidelity of marriage and sanctity of life in a culture which eagerly confuses genders, promotes divorce and engenders a culture of death by promoting abortion.

To all married couples and those who are planning to get married or start a family, do not let fear, anxiety or worry get in the way of you loving each other sacrificially and being open to the children you may receive from God. Do not put a cap on what He wishes to give you. Let Him be the judge of that. Entrust yourselves to the Lord who will provide for all your needs.

God is Relational

Solemnity of the Most Holy Trinity 2021

Let me start in treacherous territory. It’s already mind-boggling attempting to understand the concept of the Trinity, One God in three persons, what more explain it. If you are not already familiar with this, there is also the concept or belief in the three goddesses in neo-pagan religions like Wicca, often depicted as the Maiden, the Mother and the Crone, or the Hag. Each of these characters are said to be non-distinct aspects of one divine reality and they basically correspond to three life stages of a female. In other words, the Maiden is the Mother and the Crone, except, in three different stages of her life as she ages.

The point I’m trying to make here is not to suggest that the Christian belief in the Most Holy Trinity is not an original idea or even a cultural appropriation of some pre-Christian religious tradition, but quite the opposite. The dogma of the Most Holy Trinity is distinctly unique. It proposes not just a schizophrenic God with multiple personality disorder or different forms or modes of one Being, or one who likes to play different characters to make life more colourful, but that God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit, though not three gods but one, are each distinctively unique, which is why we use the word “persons” to refer to each of them.

This is what a relationship is fundamentally about, a connexion made between “persons,” at least two are needed. I’m not trying to diminish the fact that some people do describe themselves as having a relationship with a myriad of things or objects. For example, I know that many enjoy indulging in mental conversations with themselves, provided that they are aware that the voice in their head is actually they thinking aloud and not some distinct imaginary person. Likewise, there are those who have meaningful conversations with their pets, or their favourite plant or furniture. As much as one could try to stretch the meaning of the word “relationship” to cover all these, as woke culture is so fond of doing, we have to face the reality that nothing can come close to an authentic relationship between real persons.

The fact that God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit are persons, tells us that they are authentically relational. God is not just an impersonal principle like a force in nature. The fact that our God is a personal God means that He is a relational God; first in Himself, possessing and capable of a dynamic relationship between the three distinct persons of the Most Holy Trinity, as well as with the rest of His creation, with us in particular because man (and woman) are made in His image and likeness, are the only creatures apart from the angels, who possess distinct personhood which makes each of us unique, irreplaceable, and relatable.

The fact that they are three distinct Persons, not being identical in personality, like clones, nor are they merely phases in the development of man’s understanding of God, nor are they God putting on different masks at different times to appear more relatable to us at a particular moment in time, is a fundamental truth to our faith. The Church has unequivocally rejected any of these alternative explanations and labelled them heresies. No. Though there is only one God, and the Father is God, the Son is God and the Holy Spirit is God, the Father is not the Son, the Son is not the Spirit, the Spirit is not the Father. The fact that there are 3 distinct persons in the Trinity, is a key foundational truth. And yet we profess and believe that there is only one God. That too is another foundational truth.

So, we see the uniqueness of the Christian faith. We defer from strict monotheistic religions which reject any differentiation of persons in the one God. We also reject the premise adopted by polytheistic religions which argue that there are more than one God. And of course, our belief stands against those religions which have a modalistic view of God, that the one God appears in different forms or different modes, but each mode is fundamentally just another form of the same God.

They are not only 3 distinct persons, but each person of the Godhead is intimately involved with the Christian!  The dogma of the Most Holy Trinity is not just some lofty philosophical concept or irrelevant dogma but one which goes to the very heart of our identity as persons, made in God’s image and likeness, made to love, to care and to relate with others.

This is what we see in the second reading which is taken from Saint Paul’s letter to the Romans. He does not provide us with a theological explanation of how the Father, the Son and the Spirit are related to each other but a statement about how they work together in unison and in harmony in every Christian. The Trinitarian connexion reaches out, connects and enfolds. In baptism, we share in the death of the Lord Jesus and we receive the gift of the Spirit which makes us children of God, and allows us to call God Himself, “Abba, Father”.  Saint Paul elaborates on this saying: “And if we are children we are heirs as well, heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, sharing His sufferings so as to share His glory.”

So, what does this teach us about human relationships? The first thing is that people need other people. In other words, humans were made to live within community and to have meaningful love relationships with other humans. Why do we know this? Because we are made in God’s image and God has existed for eternity within a love relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. God has existed within the community of the Godhead for eternity and since we are made in His image, it should not be a surprise that humans are made to need community.

The Trinity also teaches us that the diversity of roles in any relationship is good. In fact, when our uniqueness as distinct persons are erased in the name of conformity, relationships cease to have value. Members of any human community are not products of assembly lines. Therefore, it is important to preserve and promote the various roles, charisms and parts we play in any human relationship, whether it be in a friendship, a marriage, a family or even in the Church. When gender differences are removed, hierarchical structures within the family or the Church are flattened, we end up with a distorted and revisionist vision of God’s plan. We can see from the Trinity that roles in relationships do not devalue one person over the other. There are different roles in human relationships because there are different roles in the Trinity.

In the gospel passage, in this last scene of our Lord’s climatic commissioning of His Apostles to make disciples of all the nations, to baptise them in the name of the Most Holy Trinity and to teach them to observe all His commands, we are reminded that we are sent by Christ on a mission, on a journey of love, on a pilgrimage to God, the Most Holy Trinity. We do so not as individuals, but as persons called into the Mystical Body of Christ, to be part of the communion of saints, so that through our words and deeds, we can testify that the Lord is with us always, “yes, to the end of time.” And, where Christ is present, the Father and the Holy Spirit are present too, for though each is distinct, they are inseparable.

What God has united

Twenty Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time Year B

As much as young couples preparing for marriage are already experiencing the jitters and the butterflies that come with uncharted territories, I often choose to aggravate their anxiety by issuing one last caution – “Be warned before you enter! Marriage is dangerous. So dangerous it can get you killed!” I don’t think that this is an exaggeration. It’s stating the truth, the hard truth about marriage. These couples are entering into something which only death can release. “What God has united, man must not divide.” Only God can divide and He does so through death. No wonder one traditional translation of the wedding oaths entails life-long fidelity “till death do us part.” As much as the world often mocks the Church’s teaching on the permanence of marriage, that marriage is a permanent commitment that can only be dissolved by death, the Church can do no more than teach what Christ has taught us from the beginning.

So what exactly is Christ’s teaching on marriage and divorce? As difficult or as disagreeable as this may sound, Jesus did not mince His words when He described the action of divorcing one’s wife and remarrying another as “adultery.” In the gospel that we’ve just heard today, Jesus does the unimaginable. Many modern Christians would have imagined Him coming to relax the Law. We argue that it’s only human to fail: We live in an imperfect world made up of imperfect folks who often make imperfect promises. One would imagine our Lord agreeing with this and mercifully bending His teachings to match our predicament. But instead, He proceeded to raise it. The bar would no longer be set at a level that corresponds to human imperfections and limitations but rather it would be pegged to the standard of perfect love which the Lord had for His people. And how did He love them? He loved them to the end. God and not sin, would now be the new benchmark for all human relations.

From the moment of man’s creation, God has remained faithful. Covenant is the key word to describe this relationship. God didn’t make a contract with us; God made a covenant with us. The covenant called the parties to mutual faithfulness, a faithfulness that is neither tentative nor conditional. There is no “break clause” in this covenant. But was it a happy marriage? Hardly. In fact, the whole salvation history is a story of man’s unfaithfulness matched by God’s faithfulness. God could have broken His end of the deal in the face of wanton breaches on our part. But He didn’t. God could have chosen to “divorce” His people. But He didn’t. Instead, God chose the way of love and forgiveness. This is the way of fidelity. To put it another way, He chose death over breaking His covenant with us. He staked His entire life on this covenantal relationship. He chose to stick with us in good times as well as in bad times, in sickness and in health, “till death do us part.” But even death could not separate us from His love. His unconditional love for us is therefore the foundation and the standard by which marital fidelity is to be built. Thus, we have the reason for the Church to defend its teachings on the permanence of marriage and the reason why Jesus spoke so harshly of divorce and attempted remarriage.

Perhaps, the world finds such an arrangement harsh and untenable. It does so because it seems that everything in this world is marked by a certain tentativeness, that’s why there is the inclusion of a break clause in most contracts to allow the parties to mutually exit the partnership when things turn sour. But the Catholic Church sees it differently. She takes a Catholic at his word when he makes his vows, freely and knowingly, at his wedding. The Church must likewise call him to lifelong faithfulness to that vow, for the marriage vows bring into existence a permanent union that is joined together by God. It is “God” who joins man and woman together,” and therefore only God who can put them asunder. The reason why the Church objects to divorce and would not allow a “second” marriage, is because the Church does not presume that it has the authority to erase the tape on someone’s marital history, and then pretend to take him at his word when he makes his wedding vows a second time.  Marriage is either what Christ taught us it is, or it means whatever you want it to mean.

Thus, the Church is not just being preachy and unreasonable when she tells you how serious she is about marriage. So serious that so many within the Church were willing and are willing to stake their lives on it. We do not only have the testimony of words but also the testimony of martyrs. They were willing to die not just for an idea or to defend an institution. They were willing to go to their deaths precisely because they were dying for the gospel, for Christ Himself.

There is no better place to witness this than in England. What caused the Church in England to break away from the Catholic Church to form the Church of England was this very issue of divorce and remarriage. All the country’s bishops, with the exception of Bishop John Fisher of Rochester, supported Henry VIII’s attempt to undo his first – and legitimate – marriage. Like Fisher, St Thomas More a layman and the king’s chancellor, also withheld his support. Both were martyred for defending the institution of marriage.

In a world that thrives on impermanence, where relationships are often abandoned and exchanged for new substitutes, just like the way we deal with our electronic gadgets and devices, we need to ask this question: Did Thomas More and John Fisher sacrifice their lives in vain? Were they mistaken? Could they be accused of being overly rigid in their interpretation of the law and sadly un-pastoral? One may argue that these saints lived in a very different age, with very distinct values and ideas. But have things really changed to warrant a change in the law or pastoral practice? Very much against the flow, St Thomas More and John Fisher and many more Catholics chose a path, a way of life which was going to bring them into collision with not only social mores, family and friends, but also with the highest authority in the land. They chose to die defending their faith. They chose to die defending the institution of marriage. On all these things they were prepared to stake their lives, literally, for they were things they could die for! So deep was their conviction, their faith in this that nothing could turn them away from the course they had taken, neither death nor life, no angel, no principalities, nothing that exists, nothing still to come, not any power, or height or depth, nor any created thing.

It perhaps seems strange to us today that someone should even consider giving his life for such theoretical, theological niceties. The arguments of our age turn around the fulcrum of whether or not, anything can be of such value and certainty that we should give our lives for it. Yet, again, while this argument rages, many Christians continue to give up their lives rather than to turn their backs on their faith.

What the Church needs today are not just eloquent preachers of the Word but convincing witnesses of God’s love, not merely through the weak testimony of our words but through the strong witness of our lives. There is no greater witness to this than the fidelity shown by a married couple to their marriage, the fidelity of a priest to his priesthood, the fidelity of a consecrated person to his or her vows. Remember that the ultimate strength of our convictions and the truth of our beliefs can only be proven by us staking everything on them, even our lives. To those contemplating making this life-long commitment in life whether it be to the married state of life, or the priesthood or religious life, my advice to you is “Throw in all your chips, hold nothing back and God would make up for what is lacking!”