Renounce yourself

Twenty Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time Year B

St Peter’s confession of faith is not only the turning point in St Mark’s gospel narrative but also a turning point in his relationship with the Lord. The disciple’s identity and mission pivots on the identity and mission of the Lord. To follow Him, which is to say to imitate Him, requires that they first know who He is. But to grasp that Jesus is the Messiah, is not the same as understanding what it means to be the Messiah. What the Lord does or must do, they must follow. Here, we see a breakthrough, a burst of light, a moment of enlightenment. But with every breakthrough there must be resistance, and with light, comes the shadow cast by darkness. On the one hand, Peter, the representative of all disciples, gets it but moments later we realise that he still has much to learn, to grow in both understanding and commitment.

Instead of looking at the famous exchange between St Peter and our Lord, I would like to lead you to consider the teaching of our Lord in the last part of today’s passage. It was precisely Peter’s gross misunderstanding of this teaching, which got him into trouble.

The saying of our Lord here is perhaps one of His most ironic and paradoxical. Whenever we wish to win people to a cause, a party or a club, we point out the advantages they would gain should they join our group. No sane person would paint a dark sombre picture of your organisation and expect to get long lines queuing up to sign up. When our Lord wanted people to follow Him, He said some very strange words: "If anyone wants to be a follower of mine, let him renounce himself and take up his cross and follow me."

The path to discipleship, therefore, requires three specific actions: self-renunciation, taking up one’s cross and following Christ.

Renouncing oneself seems counter-intuitive. Isn’t the goal of each person self-realisation, which is to maximise your potential and find the best version of yourself rather than to reject self? Over the centuries, we are offered an entire list of advice on how to advance ourselves. The man bent on pleasure says: "Enjoy yourself'”. The teacher says: "Educate yourself'”. The artist says: "Express yourself'”. The philosopher says: "Know yourself'”. The millennial says: “Be yourself”. But Christ says: "Renounce yourself'”.

In a modern culture that prizes individualism, perhaps one fear looms largest when we hear the call to “renounce yourself”: the fear that we will lose everything. We will be deprived of everything that makes me, “me”. Our dreams will be trashed, our desires blunted, our personality erased. We will become one more drop in a sea of endless grey.

But these fears have no basis. Our Lord assures us that when you deny yourself, you will not lose yourself. On the contrary, you will find yourself. Renouncing ourselves as the Lord’s disciples, will not diminish us. In fact, we will get a surprising upgrade. The life we find on the other side of self-denial may look far different from the life we’ve always known. But it will not — it cannot — be worse. It is a life where we gain a hundredfold more than we are ever willing to give up (Mark 10:30). It is a life with Jesus: maker of all beauty, redeemer of all brokenness, fountain of all joy. What is being renounced is not our best self, but the fallen untamed self that seeks after its own pleasure and selfish goals, the self which leads to destruction rather than salvation. When we renounce this part of ourselves, we are saying “no” to the devil: “Get behind me, Satan,” and we are saying “yes” to Christ and the salvation He offers.

After renouncing self, the Lord invites us to take up our cross. A cross is never a burden when it is taken up willingly. The problem is that we erroneously label so many things in life as crosses - when they are merely annoyances or inconveniences or things which we don’t like. What is worse than the rejection of the cross is the trivialising of the cross. Many people interpret a “cross” as some burden they must carry in their lives: a strained relationship, a thankless job, a physical illness. With self-pitying pride, they say, “That’s my cross.” When everything appears to be a cross, the real cross we must carry for Christ’s sake loses its value.

The cross which our Lord carried to Calvary, the cross on which He was nailed to and died upon, is no mere symbol. It was real. Though some Christians were privileged to be martyred in the same manner, most of us will not see this kind of death. But the point is clear. The cross represents death, not just mere inconveniences or hardships, or even a person or situation in your life. To take up your cross is the readiness to surrender everything and die to oneself, in following the Lord. Here’s the clue that distinguishes the cross from other false substitutes. The cross has to be taken up freely and willingly. This is what the Suffering Servant in Isaiah’s prophecy, which we heard in the first reading, does. He is not a reluctant victim but rather one who willingly accepts the abuse that is heaped on him, “I offered my back to those who struck me… I did not cover my face against insult and spittle.” It cannot be forced upon us. We can, therefore, choose to flee from it or choose to bear it as a trophy, a badge of honour, because we are now sharing in what the Lord endured for us.

The last part of the formula to become a disciple of Christ is found in these two familiar words, “follow me.” These two words together form a command found thirteen times in the Gospels. The words mean, immediate detachment from personal interests and attachment to Christ. “Follow Me” is a call to imitation. To be a Christian means to be of Christ, to be like Christ, to be configured to Christ, in that His identity and mission become ours. We become an “alter Christus,” “another Christ.”  But “follow me” is also a call to obedience. It is no mere invitation, but an imperative command. Those who heard the words of Jesus immediately left everything to follow Him. It was a costly decision for them. There is no genuine Christianity without obedience to Christ. The rich young man heard the call and realised that Jesus was his rightful Lord and Master, but he refused to follow Him. The true disciple does.

Giving the right answer is just the first piece of a puzzle. Living the right life is what completes it. This was the lesson St Peter had to learn and which each of us disciple-wannabes, must take to heart. The call to discipleship is radical and ultimately intertwined with the cross. The cross of our Lord Jesus is inseparable from the life of a Christian. We cannot claim to want to follow Christ if we are unwilling to renounce ourselves, take up our crosses and follow Him on the Way, which He has set for us. It goes without saying that Christ and the cross, are a package deal. But, instead of seeing it as a burden to endure, a peril to flee from or a curse which we cannot avoid, recognise the cross as the only way to salvation. There can be no resurrection if there was no cross. As St. Rose of Lima said, “Apart from the cross there is no other ladder by which we may get to heaven.” Such is the power of the cross we embrace.